This is the best valentine's day ever.

My girlfriend is amazing.

And beautiful.

Swoon.

Butterball is growing up! Here I am trying to teach him to crawl. It worked. He crawls now.

Also, big brother Timothy told their mother that he hates Rhonda (an occasional babysitter of theirs), but likes me. I feel honored.

Queer nanny gets a little queerer.

I cut all my hair off into a bad ass faux hawk.

I love it.

I'm turning into quite the player these days. I've never had a chance to date before. And apparently girls and bois like me. Who knew? 

I love it.

I start back at school soon. I get to spend time with my friends, and be far far away from my family.

I love it.

This was a much more positive post than the last one, eh?

I love it.

Fuck 2010.

No seriously.

Fuck it!

It can only get better, right?

(ha!)

The Butterball

Just a reminder about how adorbz this kid is.

I am on winter break from school, so I am relieved of my nanny duties until the beginning of January. It's actually very sad for me. I miss my butterball.

It's a silly time to learn to swim on the way down.

God, growing up is harder than I expected.

Relationships are weird. Attempting polyamory is a whole new game for me. I guess I'm enjoying it. It's freeing, but I don't think it's the way to find a life partner. It's fun for now, though.

Exploring my gender and my sexuality has been a lot of fun too. Polysexual dyke. I can't think of a better way to describe my sexuality than that. Given that I am attracted to cis women and trans men, I can't cling to the label lesbian anymore. And that's okay. Polysexual is a great term. As for dyke, I see dyke as more cultural. I am into dyke culture, drawn to dyke company and present in a dyke manner. I will always be a dyke. 

As for gender, I am a girl. But sometimes I am a very masculine, boyish girl. Dating someone who's so fluid in their sexuality has allowed me to explore this side of me more. It's awesome. There I days were I present completely feminine, completely masculine or androgynous. I'm very comfortable in the androgynous presentation.

Anyways. That's what's new with me. What's new with you?

My baby doesn't seem to do much.

Baby Matthew is four months old now.
And he doesn't seem to do much. He doesn't roll over, his mom hasn't started him on baby cereal yet, and he's still just sort of loafing around.

A big part of the problem is that he doesn't get any floor time. If he gets put down, he screams and cries until he gets picked up. Given that this chunk weighs 20 or so pounds, this can be quite exhausting for me. I hurt my back pretty bad yesterday picking him up. And now I can't bend over. He needs to learn how to be happy on the floor, because he needs to learn how to move, and I need to not strain my back everyday.

So, mommies out there, any tips on how to get this rolly polly boy to move?



My little butterball.